My Dwelling

My apartment is small, has no kitchen but I do have a refrigerator, microwave and bathroom. It costs 950 a month and utilities are included. I’m not making much more money that the sum of all my monthly bills. Such is life. When you start over in a new place, you start from zero. 

Party Time!

 I attended a fourth of July Party hosted by Oppie and his friends. It was a very fun. They rented an Airbnb property on the water and there were kayaks. And a hot-tub and live music and lot’s of cool people. Of course I was filming. I took mushrooms and I had to stop filming and took a seat with two guys my age. It turned out they had lived in Miami Beach when I lived there and now live in the Tampa Bay/ St. Petersurg area like me. What a coincidence! We joked and talked about things that were going down in Miami Beach during those days. Some of the old bars and clubs. 

Return to Miami

I had 4 days free so I went to Miami, specifically Miami Beach. I stayed with Richard and spent a night with my ex-wife, Lili. I was feeling so nostalgic seeing all the familiar streets and buildings. I have memories all over that place. It feels like the years I spent there are in another era. I reconnected with Lily. It was wonderful and it’s hard to remember any negative experiences with her even though I can consciously remember them. I told her I want to have kids but she said that she didn’t want any. Plus, she didn’t say it, but she may still be in a relationship with the guy she married. Well, I’ll leave that door open, though. 

Ferg’s Bar

I’m still working at Ferg’s. Business has slowed down because Hockey season is over. I’m working about 3 days a week which leaves me with plenty of time for editing. We have live music from time to time. I’m getting to know more of my co-workers. During the first month a few of them were stand-offish. Now they know I’m going to be there for awhile so the relationship changes. I understand. 

Chief’s BBQ

I finally finished the first of 3 Disco Brothers commercial. It was a labor. Here’s the first one:

Conclusion

If you want something you never had before, you must do something you’ve never done before.

Mi Arribo
Primer día de regreso en Tampa/St. Petersburgo. El primer día fui desde el aeropuerto a encontrarme con Oppie en la casa de su amigo. Estaban teniendo una pequeña reunión. Atravieso la puerta y me ofrecen té de champiñones. Luego tomé algunas cervezas, hierba y un poco de coca cola. Normalmente no me entrego a tantas sustancias a la vez, pero este fue mi primer día de regreso, así que… qué demonios.

El Cuerpo de Paz, Otra Vez
Soy optimista sobre el tiempo que viene. Tengo una entrevista esta semana para un trabajo en Costa Rica con el Cuerpo de Paz. Si consigo el trabajo, estaría muy emocionado. El trabajo es un contrato de 11 meses. Enseñar a una organización sin fines de lucro sobre medios audiovisuales y ayudar a la organización a despegar para que cuando me vaya estén listos para continuar sin mí.

Noche de Sangre Bicis y Bebida
Oppie y Thu viven cerca del agua en la bahía. A veces puedes ver delfines mientras desayunas en su patio trasero. Un día llevamos las bicicletas hacia al sur unas pocas millas y luego visitamos algunos bares en el camino de regreso al norte. Estaba planeando beber algunas cervezas, pero luego Oppie sacó los hongos y luego estábamos tomando tragos con casi todas las cervezas adicionales. Fuimos a algunos bares playeros geniales. Entonces las cosas comenzaron a ponerse borrosas. Recuerdo estar parado sosteniendo la bicicleta y de repente estaba en el suelo, cuando me puse de pie sentí que la sangre me corría por la cara. Por suerte teníamos una toalla para absorber la sangre. Luego fuimos, ya estaba oscuro, a comer a The Waffle House. Solo puedo imaginar lo que la gente pensó cuando entraron y me vieron con la cara ensangrentada. Al día siguiente tuve una entrevista de trabajo en un chiringuito y me contrataron; con la cara hinchada y con sangre seca. Pero decidí no aceptar el trabajo porque quería vivir en el centro de la ciudad en lugar de en un pueblo de playa.

Apartamento Con Amigos
Hubo muchos días de copas nocturnas en el departamento de Oppie y Thu. Desafortunadamente, estaba durmiendo en el sofá al lado de la puerta corrediza de vidrio que mira hacia el este, por lo que todas las mañanas el sol me golpeaba fuerte y temprano. No pude dormir. Era como si estuviera acampando. Su simpático gato “Juniper” dormía a mi lado. Así que tuve que encontrar un nuevo lugar rápido. Respondí muchos anuncios en Craigslist de personas que buscaban compañeros de cuarto, pero no tuve éxito. Así que bajé mis estándares y conseguí una habitación pequeña en un edificio dudoso. Mi habitación olía a cigarrillos. Pero era mi pequeño castillo. Mi pequeño santuario. Y podría dormir hasta tarde.

Un Trabajo
Conseguí un trabajo en Ferg’s Bar & Grill, quizás el bar más grande de los Estados Unidos. El más grande que he visto. Vine aquí el año pasado para ver un partido de hockey y siempre pensé en trabajar allí. Así que entré al lugar con un currículum para entregar. Le pregunté a un señor con una camisa de Ferg si trabajaba allí. Dijo que era el dueño. Después de la entrevista me contrataron para trabajar al día siguiente.

Ferg’s Bar y Grill
Realmente me gusta trabajar aquí. Es muy exigente físicamente. Las 7 barras están repartidas. Tarda tiempo y energia ir de un a otro. La mayoría de los bares están al aire libre de Florida, por lo que el hielo se derrite rápidamente. Durante 8 horas no deja de caminar y cargar cosas, muchas veces un “cubo de basura” lleno de hielo (más de 40 libras) sobre mi hombro caminando entre la multitud. Es impresionante. Como trabajar en un Roadhouse como el de la película ‘Roadhouse’. También servimos comida de bar, para que las familias también puedan venir. Y tenemos un parque para perros. Los perros están en todas partes. Ah, y hay un sendero para peatones que atraviesa un túnel justo al lado de nuestro establecimiento y conduce al estadio de los Tampa Bay Rays, por lo que tenemos una audiencia cautiva. Y el dinero tampoco está mal.

Mis Companeros de Trabajo
Trabajo con mucha gente joven, 20 y tantos, 30 y tantos, muchas chicas jóvenes, incluso algunas adolescentes. No sé si debería coquetear con mujeres mucho más jóvenes que yo. ¿Pero qué diablos? No estoy obligando a nadie. No soy tan agresivo sexualmente, de todos modos. Básicamente coqueteo con una chica y al mismo tiempo trato de mostrarles que no soy el tipo con el que deberían estar. Al menos inconscientemente trato de sabotearme a mí mismo.

Um Bote
Hombre, salimos en un bote. Oppie ya estaba en el barco cuando me llamó y dijo que nos encontraríamos con él y el barco en el muelle de su apartamento. Dejamos la bahía y salimos a mar abierto. De repente había varios helicópteros peinando las aguas. Resulta que alguien estaba nadando en la playa cerca de la ensenada de la bahía y fue arrastrado hacia el mar abierto. Y vimos la puesta de sol ¡fue fabuloso!

Chief’s Smokin’ BBQ

Todavia mantengo el Instagram de Chief’s Smokin’ BBQ, el restaurante de mi amigo, John. Pronto, voy a poner el comercial con los Hermanos Disco. Y ya hice varios videos para la compania.

La Playa de la Bahia
Yo, irónicamente, vivo a pocas cuadras de la playa. La playa de la bahía, que normalmente no es buena. Pero este es bueno. Hay gente en la playa, muchos jugando voleibol. Y estos son sexys jugadores de voleibol de playa masculinos y femeninos, que se toman la competencia en serio. Estoy impresionado. Bueno, también el agua no es salobre. Es un poco claro, un verde bastante transparente. Y mucha gente descansando en el agua, porque no hay grandes olas. Es como un gran lago.

Resumen

Ahora tengo muchas ganas de viajar pero sé que necesito quedarme aqui por algunos meses. Asi es la vida. Espero que no gasto demasiado dinero antes de me partida.

The DR or the RD

So I’ve been in the Dominican Republic, Santo Domingo, for a couple of weeks. I’ve been looking for a girlfriend and talking to many people, girls included, both nothing has panned out. But I did meet a German Girl and we had a good time. We visited some underground pools called Los Tres Ojos And we danced Salsa and Merengue at a Dominican night club called 77 in the colonial district. I should have gone in for a kiss with her. Damn!

Las Terrenas

Just got to Las Terrenas on the northern coast of DR. I was here in 2019 and enjoyed my time here. I met some good people and bought some weed. Now I’m back and staying in the same wonderful hostel, Manty’s Guesthouse. The first night I stayed in a cheap motel an hour out of town and it had a fierce guard dog who I befriended. One time I returned to the motel and greeted the dog through the fence and he pissed on me. I believe he thought that was a show of affection.

Las Terrenas Part 2

In Las Terrenas I saw some backpackers from the hostel in Santo Domingo. Two English guys, an Australian girl, and an American girl from Colorado. We had a few drinks at a disco on the beach where I also met up with my Italian friend who I met there in 2019, Alessandro. When I would walk around town at night I was approached multiple times by prostitutes. I politely told them that I wasn’t interested. And some of them got angry with me. One of them followed me for a few blocks down the street. She was persistent and I had to get terse with her. From an outsiders point of view it may have looked like we were a couple arguing.
So I didn’t find a girlfriend in the Dominican Republic. And the girl who I wanted to see who I met in 2019 was too busy to hang out. Oh well, on to the next chapter.

Tomorrow I fly to Tampa to start the next year of my life.

Pittsburgh West Virginia

Still in Pittsburgh/ West Virginia and I’m staying with John and Frank in a small house in the hills above the Ohio River in Wellsburg, West Virginia. Frank is a friend of John’s. They worked together in a restaurant in Pittsburgh when the Pandemic hit and so they opened Chief’s Smokin’ BBQ restaurant in Wellsburg, West Virginia. Where we’re staying, there’s no wi-fi and my data has run out. Frank lives in an area of homes laid out on the land willy nilly. And there’s trash in people’s yards. Like out of a movie. It’s cold outside, like 20 degrees, so we spend a lot of time inside. John and Frank are watching television. I’m in the kitchen editing video or writing this blog. I just can’t stand to watch television. I want to be creating television.

Working at Chief’s Smokin’ BBQ

Everyday I go with them to work. It’s cold. We start the restaurant up. While they are prepping the food, I prep the bonfire out front and my fingers sometimes get so numb I can’t light a lighter. It feels good to be occupied with work duties.

The Videos

We filmed two videos in addition to the food videos and photos. One is the ‘Disco Brothers’ and the other is the ‘Drones Dudes.’

Man, filming the Disco Bros. was so fun. We danced on the docks on the Ohio River. We danced in a barber shop. We even got the rest of the Chief’s BBQ crew to dance with us in the parking lot. And our new series: the Drone Dudes. It’s about two drone flying dudes who fly their drones and talk about it. A spoof comedy video. A good addition to my drone Youtube channel.

The Circle Inn

Me and John went to a bar near his house called the Circle Inn. Awesome place. We met and talked to many people and I met a girl there. She invited me back to her place and I said no. Me and John left then but while talking to John in the street I decided to turn back. I’ve promised myself to be more adventurous with women! We went back to The Circle Inn and I talked to that girl again. Her name is Greta. We went back to her house and had a fabulous night. Man, I feel so refreshed. We went out again.

The Dominican Republic

I just bought a ticket to the Dominican Republic. I wasn’t going to go there before St. Petersberg, but my friend, Oppie in St. Petersburg isnt’ ready to have visitors yet. I’m going to meet up with a few friends. The last time I was there, about 2 years ago, I met so many people, more than I normally meet when I travel abroad.

Brazil Over

On my way home from 2 months in Brazil. Don’t know how I feel about that. Kinda like a failure. Tried to find a girlfriend or a wife but no dice. I didn’t try as hard as I should have. Guess it comes down to fear of being rejected. I’m 48 and still have that same fear since childhood. I could have a girl by my side if I would have been brave to talk to girls. Pull the trigger. I’ll continue to try once back in the States. I need to have this activity occupy my days and life.

Texas

I flew from Sao Paulo to San Antonio, Texas. Here in Texas it’s cold but nice and I’ve been working outside a lot on my brother’s property. He’s got chickens now and we collect eggs everyday. There’s a forest on his property and we’ve been burning wood 8 days straight. We renovated and painted the barn, too. Everyday some work was done. Plenty to do. I bonded with my brother. As we are getting older we’ve been enjoying our company more and more. I feel the need to visit him multiple times a year. In the past we probably went two years between visits.

Tampa

After Pittsburg, I’m looking forward to moving to the Tampa Bay/St. Petersberg area. But I’m not looking forward to working a 9 to 5 job, but I’m optimistic that the next 1 or two years are going to be productive, full of filming and getting a girlfriend.

Pittsburg

Now back in the Pittsburg/ West Virginia area. It’s cold and snowy. I’m visiting John Gillette, an old friend from the Miami Beach days. From the get I’ve been planning the video shoots. We’re going to film two videos: A story about preventing the Vegans from taking over the world. It’s a comedy. I’m storyboarding it, which is drawing a picture of what each scene will look like. It’s more difficult at first but it pays off in the end.

Conclusion

Don’t live your life for others, live your own life. Nobody will live it for you.

I’ve been in Jericoacoara longer than expected. I just wanted to come here to watch my friend’s dog and watch over her little resort that she runs. She was supposed to have to go to Fortaleza, a major city nearby, to help her sister who was going to be recovering from surgery. She didn’t get the surgery nor is there any set date. So I’m ready to boogy south to the Sao Paulo area and start preparing for my return to the U.S. and resettling in Tampa Bay region.

My friend Silvana did something odd. We were walking far from town, near the beach but in some kind of prairie area. We had her dog with us. The dog pooped and my friend picked it up with a baggy and brought it back to town to dispose of it later. I don’t understand some people’s reasoning.

We’ve been cooking and smoking and drinking a lot. Almost everyday. And listening to Brian Jones Town Massacre. Lazy beach days. Some days I fly the drone. Almost everyday I’ve been editing video. Hot and sunny and sun reflects off the sandy streets.

Sometimes I’m not truthful with myself. I don’t write the truth. Why? I don’t know right now. I did a few days ago while quite stoned and wanted to write it down, but didn’t.

Time to fly to Sao Paulo. 8:30pm flight. I check in on time. In the waiting area the flight gets pushed back on hour then another then we hear it won’t be arriving tonight. They ship us on buses to Fortaleza, 4 hours away. Wait there for hours then fly to Sao Paulo and my bag doesn’t arrive with me in Sao Paulo so I stay in the airport 24 hours and sleep on seats. All right though, it was an adventure.

Now, I’m back in Santos, near Sao Paulo. It’s beachy, it’s urban, it has surfers. Mountains in and around the city. There’s even monkeys in the lush green forests.
Hangin out with some old friends and staying at the same Pousada as before a block from the beach. They got a good complementary breakfast. A zoo about a block away, too. I really want to initiate conversation with a girl and go out on a date.

I asked a girl out. Her name is Mariana. I met her the last time I was here. I invited her to the movies to see the latest Spiderman movie. My motive wasn’t 100 percent romantic. I simply wanted to hang out with a Brazilian girl and speak a lot of Portuguese and the movie would have provided something to focus on and talk about avoided awkward conversation. Plus the movie is dubbed in Portuguese, so for me it would have been a challenge and learning experience to try to understand it. Yet, Mariana said no. That’s cool. At least I tried, that’s the first step. I’ll ask another girl out soon.

For the first time in my life I’m missing my older brother. Our Mother died recently and this is the first chapter of our life without her. She was a bond between us. A lot of our conversations had something to do with her. My brother is married and he lives in a big house just north of San Antonio. They dont have any children and I think he gets bored. And when I visit, which I’ve done a lot since the pandemic began, we always have a good time. I called my brother recently while here in Brazil and he suggested I visit him. Since that conversation I’ve been think about that, so even though I want to stay in Brazil, I am now thinking seriously about leaving and visiting him and his wife for a couple of weeks. Then after that I’ll go to St Petersburg, Florida to get a job, and an apartment and put down roots. It’s time to go back to work and the normal life.

Last day in Mexico:

Medieval Mexico

So I’ve been here in Guanajuato a few days and I love it. It’s got a bohemian vibe to it. Like a Medieval town in the 1300’s. I visited my old friend Armando. We met about 20 years ago in Mexico City when another friend of ours, Agustine, the Spaniard, filmed a short film there and Armando was one of the actors. We’ve stayed friends after all these years and I visited him about a year ago.

Treat Yourself!

Here in Guanjuato. I got a massage by two women at the same time. Initially they offered and told me the price but I declined. But later that night I thought: I hadn’t had a massage in long time so…. What the hell, treat myself. Post massage: Honestly, the massage was so so. It actually hurt at times. She said, “I found a knot.” I’ve heard that before.

Covid Testing Racket

I needed a Covid test to fly to Brazil so I’ve been looking for a testing site. It was difficult to find a free testing sight. But I found one! I couldn’t believe it. But it was very uncomfortable. The physician really jammed that probe up my nose. He then said afterwards, while I was recovering from the shocking penetration, “If you don’t have tears, then we have to do it again.” I was tearing up, no problem, buddy.

The 2 Percenters

I always edit my “Roadents.” Hell on scooters!

Misión no Cumplida

I’m kinda sad to leave Mexico. I came here with the intention of finding a girlfriend and/or future wife. No dice. It’s like I failed. Hopefully things will go better in Brazil.

The Grass is Greener Where You Water It

Also, since it’s my last day in Mexico I’m starting to doubt my decision to go to Brazil. Like I’m seeing Mexico as better than Brasil. Yet, I believe that once I’m in Brazil, I’m going to think the opposite. And then some. All things being equal I do see Brasil as being a better place for me to live and I see their culture as being better suited for my personality. But sometimes Brazilians piss me off. Oh well, here we go again in Brasil. My 3rd time!

Back in Brazil!

I arrived in Brasil in Sao Paulo and immediately checked in to a cheap motel near the airport and the next morning I missed the flight from Sao Paulo to Jericoacoara where my friend Silvana lives and runs a small resort. It’s five cabanas. My reason for going: Her sister is going to have some major surgery and Silvana will need to take care of her for a month. So she asked me if I could come here to help run the resort and watch her dog.

Missed Flight!

So I had to buy another plane ticket. Now I’m back in Jericoacoara and it’s as beautiful as I remember it. It looks like a town from the planet Tatooine from Star Wars. I’ve been getting stoned every day and drinking every so often. When she leaves, I look forward to having the place to myself and a working a little bit interacting with the hotel guests.

I’m finding it hard to remain focused and tend to my responsibilities.

Beach Paradise Fuckin’ Town

I passed New Year’s Eve here in Jeri, and there’s a rav in town. I big mult-day concert with traditional Brazilian music and electronic music. I filmed with the drone the concert and beach with wind-surfers galore. Oh and been smoking weed everyday and drinking almost everyday. Don’t know if this is a good thing. I’m going to dial it back after the holidays.

It’s been difficult remaining focused and doing work like editing for money and my personal projects. At home at Silvana’s, there’s lots of distractions and I don’t know how much attention to give to her versus doing my own thing and ignore her to some degree. I want to be a good guest. She said she’ll find out soon when her sister gets the operation and therefore Silvana will need my help in watching her dog and minding to her business. I think that I’ll have to say an ultimatum like, if by the 15th of January we don’t have an answer, I’m going to make plans to leave.

It’s a desert wonderland here. Sand buggies. Bikinis galore. Parties. Sunsets. Like Tatooine with sex. We just need androids. And Jawas. Why is Tatooine the most popular planet in all the planets of the Star Wars Universe? You’ve seen the Mandalorian? Ok, then you’ve seen Jericoacoara. It’s a Tatooine city with a beach.

I had to get a haircut but the Barbar was too busy so I found another place I had never been to before. I asked how much for a haircut and the gay guy told me 35 reais. I said ok. That’s about 7 dollars. Then I noticed that he was nursing a cold. I should have bolted but I stayed. His method of cutting hair was terrible and I should have left for that, too. But I didn’t want to be rude. When he was finished he handed me a mirror and asked me how it was. I lied and said it was good. He told me the price and now it was 70 reais. What? I didn’t want to argue so I just paid it. A couple of days later I came down with a cold that had me bed-ridden for 1 day and a half. Damn, when will I learn to be more assertive in the moment and not simply promise myself that I will do better next time?

Conclusion

No one is going to live your life for you.

Veracruz

After a month in the capital, I went to the historical city of Vercaruz. It’s on the Gulf of Mexico and it’s where Hernan Cortez landed to then march to what is now Mexico City and conquer the Aztecs and consequently all of this region. I was a little disappointed. It was smaller than expected. And a little more busy than a ghost town. It didn’t seem very historical. For example Cartagena, Colombia really looks like a historical city. It’s got the whole nine. Forts, walls, cannons, medieval buildings and seedy Caribbean pirate bars.

The Blue Oyster
I was in Veracruz for about a week, staying at a hostel, The Blue Oyster, where I shared a room with 9 other people. It was a small hostel but overall it was a good. I met a German girl and a Japanese guy in the kitchen/dinging room/ TV room and we drank and had a conversation about the world and culture. And older American dude showed up and he said some weird stuff. We got into a heated discussion. All good, though. Yet I became bored with the town so I went to Xalapa.

Xalapa, Mountain Town

Years ago I had visited Xalapa. It’s a medium-sized city in the mountains between Mexico City and the Gulf of Mexico. I had been here with my old friend Richard and his then girlfriend, Claudia, who is from Xalapa. I fell in love with the city and always wanted to come back. Sourrounded by green mountains, you can se a snow covered mountain, and green biomatter invading the town. There, I found an awesome hostel in the center of town, the old colonial part. There’s lot’s of stores, cafe’s, restaurants, and night-life all right here close to the hostel. I wish there was revolution in the air and…..you get the point.

Party at The Lake

It was fabulous. I hung out a lake in town. There were outdoor concerts and lot of street vendors and people walking the streets and lakeside. I ducked in to a bar to do some editing and have a beer. I hadn’t drank in 4 days, but I really wanted a beer. Life was getting boring and I needed a little reality-changer.

The Cross I Bear

Lately editing video has been slow and difficult. I’ve been working a one video for a long time and frankly never satisfied with the result. So I keep on making changes to it hoping I’ll like it.

I think I’ll be here for awhile. If I find my wife I’ll stay, but if not, it’s on to Brazil.

I saw a girl walking in the opposite direction. We locked eyes. And I kept walking. Another missed opportunity. How long will I not face the facts? Come on! I need to talk to a girl and ask her out someday.

Absent of Tourism

Mexico is right next door to the United States and the United States has 350 million people and I’m the only American here!? Perhaps the only foreigner. Why? The outdoor concert is rocking! Why isn’t there tourists. It blows my mind. You’d think with all the Americans next door, 350 million, a few would trickle through. At a similar outdoor concert in the USA, you would hear many different languages in the crowd. You would see many different nationalities walking down the street and in the park. But here, as far as I can see and as far as I can hear, it’s only Mexicans. And this event is totally awesome!

Zaira Lopez

I was walking down the street and it began to rain and I ducked under an awning to find refuge. A girl did the same. We struck up a conversation and when it stopped raining I walked with her to the city center because it was where I was heading and it was on her way home. She was walking from her job because her work hadn’t paid her yet and she didn’t have money for the bus. We exchanged Instagrams and agreed to go out later. A few days later we had dinner at a Chinese restaurant. The conversation was good and she’s attractive. She invited me to attend a religious procession that started from her church to go around the neighborhood for 2 hours then end up back at the church. The procession was in honor of a Catholic holiday called “Christ is King” celebrated every November 21st. After the procession was a mass. I didn’t expect that but it was a wonderful cultural experience and I met lots of people. A few days later we hung out, went to the movies, saw the film Venom. It was dubbed in Spanish and I didn’t understand everything but enjoyed the challenge of trying to get the gist utilizing body language and facial expression. I had a hunch she was attracted to me but I didn’t feel the same way. But I’m very happy to have gone out on a date. I need to go out on more dates.

Old Sports Injury

My knee is still not 100%. I hurt it running six months ago in May of 2021 in the city of Santos, Brazil. I think it’s a meniscus tear, which is common for middle aged people like myself. I didn’t see a doctor hoping that it would heal on it’s own. Now I think I should see a doctor. Well, I’ll wait until I stop traveling when I return to the United States and see a doctor then.

Conclusion

Don’t put your eggs in one basket. Spread them around.

Still In The Capital

Well Mexico has been full of filming and editing. I still need to force myself to talk to more strangers and to girls I’m attracted to. I did go out on a date, though. It was with a girl from here named Erika. We went to a café called “Café de Nadie” It was fun. I brought a list of questions. Special questions that explore one’s values and some that are simply funny, like: What’s the best part about taking a selfie? The questions were a hit. Another example: If you could change something about yourself, what would it be? Each question lead to a conversation…a great conversation. Then we walked around the town and checked out some cool places. We went to a big traffic circle with a statue in the center where we kissed. She initiated the kiss, ‘cause honestly I wasn’t feeling good (upset stomach) and wasn’t attracted to her at that level. It was a little uncomfortable. She sensed how I was feeling and it made the rest of the night a little odd. On the way back to where I was staying I suggested we go to a bar and have a drink. Just one drink ‘cause I’m abstaining from alcohol. Or trying. Later when we got the bill I saw they charged me hella pesos. Most likely the most expensive whiskey they possess even though I just ordered a whiskey, without specifying. I got angry and gave the waitress a piece of my mind. Instead I shouldn’t have gotten mad but simply paid the bill and left. It was water-under-the-bridge. Oh well, lesson learned. Ascertain the price before every purchase.

Mask Hysteria

Like in Brazil, almost everyone here wears masks on the street. Not me. These masks aren’t filters. They don’t filter nothing. I realize that if one is sick and coughing and sneezing, the masks would serve a function. But there’s no reason that healthy people should be wearing them. It’s incredible how many people are wearing masks…and nobody, not the police, are enforcing them. I’m no rebel, but now I’m feeling rebellious….for simply being natural?

Editing

Speaking of editing video. In addition to the construction videos I’ve been doing for Mortonstones based in Fort Lauderdale, and my Web-Series, The Roadents, I’m creating a Youtube channel for all the videos I made while in Madagascar……videos of my students in class, in English Club, on field trips, and the activities we had at the school. Also, videos of the small town I lived in. There’s about 40 videos in all. This is something I should have done long ago, but better late than never.

Drugs

I’m amazed that I’m very infrequently drinking alcohol and not smoking marijuana. I know it’s better for my health, but also I think it’s helping me to grow psychologically. When I smoke and drink regularly, it’s almost like I wont allow myself to open up and have fun and be social until I’m under the effects of one of the two, or both, drugs. Now, I have to face the social situations because the drugs will not arrive to save me. Also, I’ve cut back on the amount of coffee I drink. Before I would drink 3 to 4 cups a day, and I would drink a cup when I was feeling tired. Now I must work through any tiredness without any help of caffeine.

New Forms of Learning

I think I’ve discovered a way to improve my Spanish, my speaking skills in general, and my social skills. I prepare something I want to say, translate it into Spanish, I’ll rehearse a couple of times then I record myself speaking it in front of the camera. Doing this forces me to learn and practice new words and phrases. Then of course, I watch it. It’s fun, too.

Returning To The States

Tomorrow I go to the United States to attend my mother’s funeral in Tucson, Arizona. I’m not looking forward to it. I’m comfortable here in Mexico and don’t want to leave. But it will be good to see family, especially my brother. I’ll only be there for a couple of days, though. As well, I’ll be seeing my aunts, Mimi and Lisa. Mimi has a wonderful heart and is always happy to see me. She is a little crazy and fun to be with but she gets emotional and cries a lot and can be very negative. She always thinks that I will never visit her again, so she constantly asks me, “Will you come back to see me?” and “You’re never going to come back to see me!” She gets sad very quickly. She also likes to drink, so we usually have a few drinks when I’m there. Lisa is different. I haven’t seen her in many years. I’ve tried to visit her and call her but she never answers. My brother tells me that she’s really into leftist politics and talks about that a lot, which can be annoying. In my experience when it comes to people like that, you have two solutions….ignore their conversation or engage them in the political talk. If I respond by talking politics they normally get angry, if they are leftists, and we all feel uncomfortable. We’ll see how it goes.

I just returned from my short trip to the United States. It was a very meaningful two days. I attended the funeral and saw a few relatives I hadn’t seen in a long time. My brother, his wife, and my father and I all stayed at the same hotel. And the last night we bought some wine, cheese, sliced meat and hung out at the pool. What a good time talking and getting some “therapy” in the hot tub. It had been a long time since I was in a hot tub so it really felt therapeutic.

Now I’m back in Mexico City and it’s time to edit video, even though it’s tedious, I do it everyday.

Walk in The Park

Today I went out on this Sunday afternoon to the Park and took a lot of good video of people enjoying themselves, a rock band playing Billy Joel and Wings, people walking dogs, open-air dancing classes, and people just being happy.

While at the park I ate a THC gummie that I brought back from the States. When it hit me I became cheerful and happy, and I talked to many people. I even talked to homeless panhandlers and old folks. I saw two girls walking pass me and I said to them that they walked very well…like professionals. I immediately regretted that because I thought that that could be taken for comparing them to prostitutes and that wasn’t what I was trying to say. Also, I talked to some people who wanted to practice their English with me so I taught them a phrase or two then told them that I would be back to quiz them. I didn’t plan on coming back but I happened to see them again and gave them the quiz. They forgot the phrases so I reminded them how to say it. They loved it. It was a fabulous day and the THC gummy helped out a lot.
I walked the streets of Mexico City listening to music and checking out the night life. I’m not drinking so this is a way to enjoy the night life. There are some really cool-looking establishments and good-looking, well-dressed people here.

Tinderling

I got a match on Tinder so I sent her a message asking her if she wants to go out for dinner. This will be the first time I meet-up with someone on Tinder. I’d prefer to meet someone the old-fashion way, like face to face, physically in person, but oh well, you got to do what you got to do.

A Date

I had a date with a Mexican girl I met at a hostel. We went out for wine in a swanky cafe/restaurant on a corner. It was sexy. You just have to see it. You’d be transported back to Paris in the 1920’s. We ended back at my place. It had been awhile since I had sex. It was good but I wasn’t very attracted to her so I wasn’t totally gung-ho. I’m still looking for my girl.

The Weed Gods

I was walking to a cafe/bike shop and passed a bag of weed on the ground. I snatch it up even though I stopped smoking. Well, I can smoke this. After all, I didn’t buy it and once it’s gone I won’t buy another.

City up next: Veracruz

Mexico City

Mexico has been good. On the 2nd night, I was walking home from a bar and a cop car passed me, I know the score, then it pulled back to ask me a few questions. I was nervous while talking to the officer in the passenger seat. They asked me if I had weapons or drugs. I answered no. Then they searched me…shook me down. They didn’t detect my THC vape pen in my front pocket. I few days later I walked out my hotel with a beer in my hand was immediately pulled over by two over-excited cops who threatened to haul me into the police station to pay a fine for drinking in public. I pleaded my case and was able to walk away with my beer after paying them about 15 dollars. This has happened many times over the years in Mexico so I’m an old pro. Lol.

Social Anxiety

I haven’t been very social but been busy walking around town, talking to the merchants, and the girls who work at the front desks or hostesses. I want to talk to strangers but it’s so unnatural. I get stage-fright. Everyday, like I did in Brazil, I wake up promising myself that I will talk to strangers. Always saying tomorrow’s the day. At times optimism will allow you to not leave your comfort zone.

Talking To Strangers
I was at a cafe today and I was determined to initiate a conversation with a stranger. There was a girl reading a book at a table nearby. I struck up a conversation with her. Turns out she was reading a book in English, written by the guy who wrote Fight Club. We talked a lot and traded Instagrams. I told her perhaps I’ll invite her out if I do anything. I crossed a hurdle!

Stolen Number
I discovered an incorrect charge on my debit card. Somebody got my number and bought something for 400 dollars. I quickly called my bank in order for them to wipe off the charge but they have to cancel my debit card. How am I going to get cold hard cash in Mexico? Well, at least I have my credit card.

Editing All Day
While here I’ve been busy edited construction videos for a company, Mortonstones, back in Miami…more specifically, Fort Lauderdale.

Also, I’ve been editing a mockumentary that me and my friend Oppie created called The Roadents. Add to this I’ve been studying and using the software After Effects. It’s a powerful editing program for special effects. It’s complicated and tedious but so damn good that any editor worth his weight in beans has to learn it.

Cacao
I went to a Cacao ceremony hosted by a Mexican friend, Maru, who from Mexico City. Cacao is chocolate without the sugar and milk. 15 of us sat on the floor in a circle singing songs and each taking turns telling the group what we are thankful for. We drank it from bowls made from coconut shells. It was enjoyable, and a welcome change from my normal daily routine. Cacao is not a drug, as far as I know, but it does give you a slight hangover the next day. Maru invited me to a two-day Ayahuasca ceremony the following weekend. I wanted to attend but I had too much editing to do. I’ve taken Ayahuasca two times before, in Brazil and Miami, and I recommend it. It allows you to get out of your mind and see yourself, and the world, from a different point of view.

Vlog
I’m going to start a simple Vlog. Just me looking into the camera and talking in Spanish. Not to reach an audience but to get in the habit of making that style of filmmaking and to practice Spanish and practice speaking in front of the camera. And to put down on record what I’m doing and how I’m behaving in the present.

Death of My Mom

Soon after arriving in Mexico City I found out my Mother had died. My Mom wasn’t doing very well. Her death was not a surprise for any of us. She was on her deathbed. The day before I flew to Mexico, I, my brother, and my Aunt had been with her in Tucson. We spent the day with her talking about memories we shared in the past. She laid in bed listening to us while doing nothing more than blinking. My brother whispered to her that it was alright if she passed on. And she did.